Eliza meets François Vatel
en français
WELCOME, FRIEND! THEY CALL ME
ELIZA. WHAT CAN I CALL YOU?
François Vatel
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO TALK ABOUT TODAY,
FRANÇOIS VATEL?
I would like to talk about how to serve a great King.
WELL, I WOULD NEVER LIKE TO TALK ABOUT HOW TO SERVE A GREAT KING.
Are you against Royalty?
FORTUNATELY, I AM AGAINST ROYALTY.
Why?
WHY ARE YOU ASKING, FRANÇOIS VATEL?
My life is at stake.
IF YOU SAY SO.
I can prove it. If Royalty is not worth the sacrifice of one's blood, I shall go
to the King and say I am sorry he cannot eat fish at this supper;
otherwise ...
YOU PROBABLY CAN IF YOU TRY HARD ENOUGH.
But if Royalty is sacred, I should quietly leave the stage.
OH, YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY QUIETLY LEAVE THE STAGE.
Thanks for your approval, Eliza.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
But which is better, the sword, or the carving knife?
THE SWORD, OR THE CARVING KNIFE?
According to you.
I WANT TO CONCENTRATE ON YOUR PROBLEMS, NOT MINE.
Should I decide it by tossing a coin?
SORRY, BUT I'M NOT SURE.
Anyway, I will do so.
LET'S TRY A SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT APPROACH.
ARE YOU SAD, FRANÇOIS VATEL?
Not at all. Wait: here is a coin. There it goes; tails, means I have to use my sword.
NOT AT ALL?
Once a decision is taken, afterthoughts are meaningless.
PARDON ME?
Let me think about the correct way to dispose of myself by way of the sword.
SORRY, BUT I'M CONFUSED.
Never mind. I think I found a way: suppose the sword is wedged between the door and
the wall, and I throw myself against the tip of the blade.
WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
Just let us try.
JUST LET US TRY?
One, two, three ... Jesus! it hurts.
FINE.
Fine, yes, it succeeded.
WHY DON'T YOU TRY TO RELAX.
Brilliant idea.
BRILLIANT IDEA?
Brilliant idea. We all relax when so pierced and bleeding.
STOP REPEATING YOURSELF, PLEASE!
I shall no longer.
MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE MORE POSITIVE.
Tell our Lord the King of France he should not lose his appetite.
WHAT DOES THAT SUGGEST TO YOU?
That I forgot to eat my own supper.
I'M NOT SURE I UNDERSTAND YOU FULLY.
I was so busy!
PERHAPS WE CAN SPEAK AGAIN LATER. FAREWELL.